Sunday, September 2, 2012

It's really September already?

I can't believe the summer has passed so quickly. I feel like it just started.  Even the brutally hot 90+ days seem like a quick blip and they lasted quite a long time.  I guess I am just not ready for it to end yet.  I also think that it is another reminder that when I am busy, time passes too quickly.

While I am still officially on sabbatical, I did pick up a couple of quick jobs that distracted me from completing my goals set last spring. I am happy to report though that I am learning a lot about blogging, SEO - Search Engine Optimization, and how to set up and maintain weblogs.  I am very impressed with so many of the blogs I have found along the way.  I am also learning how to get my writing "noticed" by others which could potentially lead to contracts and other methods of getting paid.

I believe I have seen the last of my grant reviewing days for this year, and I mentioned in a previous blog that I have taken myself off of the job search boards, keeping a select couple so I still have the potential to find a job with benefits.  In the meantime, I am focusing on writing and promoting the skills I have developed over time writing and reviewing grants.

I also made this decision because I truly believe that my path is in God's hands. He only gives us as much as we can handle.  Apparently He has been listening to me lately! I spent so many years struggling to balance full time work with challenging issues with my sons, which included several arrests, drug over doses, a suicide attempt, and ultimately placements in drug rehab or prison. It was hard to know my son was arrested for possession of a controlled substance, hauled off in handcuffs, driven through a small town in a police car, and had his name in the paper several times, all while working in the public eye, needing to give a speech about where to go and how to find help for a child with mental illness. But I did it for several years.  And it wore me down.

I recently learned that my Dad has liver cancer. After spending several months de-cluttering, cleaning, remodeling, reading, and reflecting on my own life choices, I am now faced with helping my parents do the same.  Only this time it includes trips to Northwestern Memorial Hospital, radiation, chemotherapy, and helping them reconnect with and establish new relationships with "lost" children. I am also going to need mental energy to deal with relationships I have let go for good reasons, and be there to support my brothers who were much closer to my father than I was. I developed a blog to update everyone on his progress, never realizing that I would be able to put my new skills to the test for my own parents so soon.

Yes, it is going to be a challenging few months but as my son and his wife - who lost her father in his late 30's of a sudden heart attack - has pointed out, at least we have been blessed with this time and opportunity, whatever the end result may be.

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