Saturday, September 14, 2013

Our son has died

I never thought I would need to say the words "our son has died" or "this morning your brother/grandson died". But two weeks ago, on the morning of August 30, 2013, those words came out of my mouth, even though I hardly believed what I was saying.

To say I am sad is an understatement.  I am still grieving the loss of my Dad in April, and trying to help my Mom make sense of her new normal, life without my Dad.  I almost lost her twice within a month because after my Dad died, she embarked on a journey of self destruction.  Now, we share our grief in yet another way. She lost her grandson, I lost my son.

In the past few months I have not posted on here because I have been busy getting her house ready to put on the market, helping her find a new home in another state closer to my brothers family, and trying to take care of the daily responsibilities of two households, a dog, my family, and still find time for my husband and myself. While I am still unemployed on sabbatical, I am busier than if I just had a full time job.  Now I am so happy I still not working.  I knew God worked in mysterious ways, and now I can understand better why I have not been hired yet, despite all the hours spent looking, applications submitted online and in person, and interviews I have been on.  God has a different plan for me and has taken me down a different path once more.  A detour of sorts. An angry and sometimes excruciatingly painful path.

So once I get my Mom settled in her new home, I am coming home to resume my sabbatical.  I will not post sad tales on this blog.  This is reserved for happier stories, stories of my grandchildren and quirky Mom. And don't be surprised to find a new blog started at some point this fall.

Friday, June 14, 2013

80 Days with Judy - Part 2

Mom had her knee surgery on May 31 and after several days of goofy behavior post-operative delirium she is now progressing nicely in a Senior Rehabilitation and Physical Therapy Center. Her knee looks very good and after having three previous knee surgeries, she has declared this one "beautiful".  While Mom has been busy rehabbing her knee and relaxing, I have continued to downsize, declutter, and organize her house - preparing for the possibility of listing the house for sale in the fall.

As mentioned in a prior post, over the past few weeks we have donated boxes and boxes and bags upon bags of clothing and household items, just so we can see what is in her closets.

Simultaneous to downsizing, the community my parents live in experienced major flooding.  Thankfully we were able to donate several boxes and bags to the local church who collected items for the flood victims.

With all the cleaning and sorting we have been doing, one room began to collect the "extras", things Mom decided to keep "just in case" or that she didn't want to part with "just yet", but didn't know where to store them, so they ended up in her office. 

In here 

Office Before

You may be thinking, "How did you get in there to clean?"

I tip-toed very carefully, hoping I wouldn't trip.  

Hoping I wouldn't fall - I didn't have Mom's life line on me.

Hoping I could finish the project without hurting my back, within the limited time I allowed myself during this trip back to her house.



I hardly threw anything out!!!  Just a few more pens.

I found a "home" for most of the items by grouping and organizing office supplies, books, CD's, and pens. Now everything has a place. Including the 20 dispensers of packing tape. I created a mailing station for all the big envelopes, tape, mailing labels, etc.  There is still much work to be done in this room but for now, we can move around and find what we need.

And now for the pens............

Pencils, pens, highlighters - OH MY! - placed neatly on top of the
mailing station and children's bins of crayons

These 7 containers of pens, pencils, highlighters, extra lead and erasers are what is left over of weeks of sorting through pens and weeding out the ones that don't work. We tossed away the equivalent of 2 containers and gave away another 2 containers of pens that still worked.  This doesn't count the two BINS of crayons, markers, and pencils that are marked "Grandchildren", or the red box of crayons that are Mom's.

Or the cups of pens on the filing cabinet in the kitchen or the drawers in every room.  Like I said, we still have more to do.

 But for now - it is done.
Family Tree information
Sewing notions
Mom's red crayon box - out of the reach of little hands
Mom's puzzles - she will never be bored
I pick on my Mom for all the pens she has accumulated in the last few years (Oh believe me we have downsized and SHE has downsized her collection many times over the years) but it made me think. Just for fun - I challenge everyone who reads this to gather all your pens, pencils, erasers, highlighters, markers and crayons together in one place.  Now see how many you have and let me know.